4.       Being Busy Easily Masks for Holiness…but Only for a Season-  Parents, Youth Pastors, and leaders.  Just because a kid is at the church every time the doors open, and has never been known to or been caught making choices such as drugs, alcohol, or having sex doesn’t mean they are living a Holy life.  All of us can make ourselves busy enough to avoid those things, but it doesn’t mean that we are choosing to follow Christ.  For example, if a teen has never been seen at a party because he is always at his Friday night church function, and is at church every Sunday and Wednesday…. Does this equal holy?  What if the same student is known for being highly disrespectful to their teachers and parents?  What if the same student is known in the hallways for speaking with regular and harsh profanity?  What if the same student is known in school for bullying students?  Do any of these things sound Holy?  I believe that Holiness is measured by facing the things of the world and choosing to follow Christ.  We should not think that just because a kid is scheduled from morning to night with things and has no opportunity to do “those things” means they desire a holy life.  A student that is so involved with school work and sports that they can’t go do things that we consider bad isn’t a guarantee of a holy life it is merely the testimony of a teen who is busy.  A student choosing to stay home bored rather than go somewhere that may have questionable activities is much closer to holiness than a students who chooses a huge cool church party over huge cool field party.

     I also think it is important to remember that when it comes to sin that there is sins of action and sins of no action.  The action sins are the ones that we can see like; bullying, sex, disrespect of authority, etc.  The sins of no action are the things that are much harder for us to see and measure like; not praying, not studying the word, not sharing the gospel with nonbelievers, not encouraging others, not confessing sin, etc.  Parents, youth pastors, and leaders are asking these questions, or are we content with the fact that the seats are full and it seems like are kids are not getting in trouble?  This is a question that I personally wrestle with when I think about my ministry.

5.       We Need to be Ok with Poor Choices-  If you think I am saying that teens will be teens or that boys will be boys you are wrong.  What I mean is that every Christian on the planet makes mistakes.  Teenage Christians are going to make mistakes.  Convincing ourselves that if our church keeps our teens busy they will make good choices is a completely false idea.  Parents how many friends and coworkers do know that have been unfaithful in marriage or been apart of an unethical business practice despite the fact that they seem as busy as they can get?  You see being busy does not cause to choose to follow Christ is just makes us busy. 

   Rather than scheduel our kids to a point of no choice we as adults need to be prepared to walk our teens through mistakes.  I am not sure that we should do everything we can to keep them from the possibility of mistakes.  Our responsibility as parents and youth pastors is to get them ready to leave and be on their own. To prepare adn disciple them to be the next generation of leadership for the gospel.  It is not our job to intercede in every possible failure, but rather to allow margin for error; and when both holy and unholy choices are made we are to be there to walk them through it!  There is a reason when pilots are being trained to fly that instructors actually set up scenarios where the pilot in training could make a mistake crash (In simulators hopefully).  The reason is so that when they are really flying with passengers on board they have been trained for the situation and know how to handle it. Church leaders and parents need to do the same so that when our children are adults and a coworker makes a pass at them they know how to make the Holy choice of being faithful to their spouse rather than the unholy choice of having an affair. That is Holy.  Telling your son to work at a job where there are no women so there is no potential of an affair is living as a monk, and does not follow the example of Jesus when He prayed in John 17:14-19, "I have given them your word, and the world has hated them because they are not of the world, just as I am not of the world. I do not ask that you take them out of the world, but that you keep them from the evil one. They are not of the world, just as I am not of the world. Sanctify themb in the truth; your word is truth. As you sent me into the world, so I have sent them into the world."    We need to help raise teens that when they are adults are able to choose ethical business practices rather than make an extra million.  We need to be ok with teens making mistakes in order to disciple them and push them to more Christ like and sanctify them in the truth.

     I hope these thoughts are helpful to Parents, Pastors, and teenagers as well.  They are by no mean The Way to fix all the woes of this generation; as a matter of fact some of them probably won't help at all, but I do think it is a place to start.  I pray this generation of teens will be unlike any other and this generation of adults would invest in the next generation more than ever before.

2.       Parents What are You Communicating-   (Parents you have a difficult job, and we all know that there is no book on how to parent that really covers it.  Also please know that my children are not teens yet so I am not saying any of this claiming to be an expert, but I have been a youth pastor for 14 years so I hope I can help bring some insight.)  It is ok to keep your child busy with activities so they are not just at home being couch potatoes.  It is ok to want them to take advantage of safe clean fun opportunities.  Yet, parents be aware of what you are saying to your child without saying a word.  When your child has a huge test on a Thursday and there is a 1 hour and 15 minute worship opportunity for your teen Wednesday night and you tell your child they cannot go to worship because they have a test.  That speaks a million things without a word being said.  I believe it communicates how much we value worship and how much we value a college scholarship.  Be mindful of what you push your child to be apart of.  For example, I see parents that beg their kids to come to our lazer tag night, but if the youth group goes on a prayer walk it may never be mentioned to your child.  Why would you expect your child to make it a priority to stay involved in church in college if you weekly walk in 10 minutes late and bolt for the door when the invitation starts?  Parents if you want your child to be plugged into the youth group I don’t believe that means that they have to do every single thing the group offers, but I do think you should encourage all of it and not just the things that seem cool.  Parents, I also believe we need to think long and hard how we communicate what matters to us.  We have to begin to communicate that commitment to Christ is what we desire for kids long term not just a social connection.  We also need think more in how to communicate that being busy with the mission of gospel is out LIFE not just busy with school, sports, and social seen of "good" people. (John 4:34)

3.     We Need to Think Long Term-  The day that students graduate from high school the reality is that many if not most that attend college will at least attempt to be in some form of fraternity or sorority life.  That being said, if your teenager was only encouraged to be involved in the church because of the all the fun social activities provided by them; then you should go ahead expect that your student will only be involved with their Fraternity or Sorority in college.  Why?  Because Frats and sororities will offer more of those events and will spend a ton more money on them, meaning they will be “cooler,” and more “social.”  We need to realize and plan for how we prepare students for college and adulthood.  We cannot just be concerned with teens not getting into trouble or making a bad choice today.  We need to think strategically of what is going to come and then both train and model what it means to be a follower of Christ in those situations. For example, one of the reasons parents push so hard in their homework is because they know in college professors have no mercy and we want them to ready for the academic challenge of college.  Yet, what are you doing to prepare your kids for the moral challenges?  Keeping your kids so busy that they never have to choose between right or wrong is not preparation.   Just because a kid didn’t do something "bad" today doesn’t mean he or she is prepared to face that choice of choosing Christ tomorrow.

Part 3 and my final 2 thoughts on this idea will come later this week.

                I can remember in my early years of youth ministry hearing all the time that you just need to have enough regular activities to keep kids out of trouble and to give them an alternative to doing something or going somewhere “bad.”  So I did just that. I would create these really fun nights of games, prizes, and social activity as often as possible.  I would almost always have a time where we would take a moment (20 minutes or less) to share the gospel with the group of course.  It seemed like every time it was a huge success, and everyone loved me for it.  I would get hugs and be showered with praise for putting something like that together.  And almost every time I would also hear those words again, “It is so nice that you do so many activities for our kids so they have an alternative to those other “things” out there, and it has really helped our child stay out of those things of the world.”  Man from all accounts of the people around me I was making a huge impact on the lives of teenagers which is what I felt God had called me to do and I was on cloud 9.

                Though one thing did seem strange to me.  On occasion I would plan a night for our students that didn’t consist of laser tag, dogeball, lock-in, or concert.  These nights were just simple nights of worship, nights of prayer, nights of making phone calls to first time guests, and other things like this.  These nights were on average attended by less than 10% of the students that had attended the lockin night. For you none math majors; that means if 100 came to laser tag then 10 or less would come to prayer night.  No matter how much we advertised or pushed kids to invite a friend it was always lowly attended.  Even more puzzling was that the parent involvement on such nights was even harder to get!  I would rarely get 1-2 parents agree to be involved if I was lucky.  Then when Sunday rolled around and I walked the halls of the church no one ever thanked me for those nights.  I was never hugged or told well done for these nights given for students.

                Then all of sudden I started seeing some of those same faces who had thought I was a rock star coming to me in tears about the life that their child was now living in college.  They would tell me how their child was no longer attending church and they were not even sure what they thought about God.  Some said their student still believed in God, but thought church was just an old unnecessary tradition that they didn’t need to in their life.  These parents looked completely blindsided and could not explain how their child went from being at the church “all the time” to a student who never attended almost overnight.

 I believe as I have tried to evaluate this issue of why students are dropping out of the church and the Christian life in college there are several issues and no two students are alike in their reasons.  To be honest some of these students had incredible parents who discicpled their children well and were involved in every way, but I do believe an overarching theme is that we have all been convinced that “Busy is Holy”.  We have fallen into the same belief as society of the busier you are the better you are.  This idea has some truth to it, but it is time for us as a church body and parents to realize that this is not the measure of holiness.  So I would like to offer up 5 thoughts of how to both better measure and to better disciple our children to a life of holiness.

1.        Still Have Fun-  I want to be clear to say that in no way should we all jump on the band wagon of Youth ministry should be boring and have zero fun social events.  This idea is false!  We should offer fun alternatives to help teach our kids that there other things you can do besides go to drunken orgy parties.  We should have events that display to teens there are people who want to have fun in ways outside of sinful activities.  There should be great events that allow those who have not yet surrender to the Lordship of Christ to come and see that Christians have fun too and have an opportunity to hear the Gospel presented to them.  Youth ministry should not cancel fun times together, I believe we just need to have more balance.  Youth ministry/Student Ministry should not be defined by boring nor should it be defined as being a constant flow of fun scoial events.  We should be defined by enjoying Christ, glorifying His name, and always having gospel purpose to what we do.

Next post will be about Parent Communication.....

Also you should know that these questions were written in such a way that they could be used by guys and girls. So if you wondering why I don't have questions specific to a gender that is why. Hope you enjoy and find these helpful.

1. Who is Jesus Christ? I John 4:1-3

2. When and how did you commit your life to Christ and receive Him as your Lord and Savior? 2 Corinthians 6:14-7:1

3. How often and what are you studying in the Bible on your own, and what is God teaching you? Ephesians 6:17; James 1:22; Matthew 4:1-11

4. How often do you have concentrated prayer, and what are the things that you are praying for right now in that time? Luke 5:16; James 5:16; Mark 9:28-29; Mark 14:32-42

5. How are you involved in your church and how often are you at a church gathering or function? I Corinthians 14, Hebrews 10:25

6. Would you be willing to meet with my parents or pastor before we begin dating? May I meet with yours? Ephesians 5:25-26; Proverbs 15:22-23

7. What do you see as my a spiritual strengths and what do you see as my spiritual weaknesses? I Samuel 16:7; Ephesians 5:26

8. What is the purpose of dating according to scripture? Ephesians 5:21-33; II Timothy 2:22

9. Would the person you dated before me, your parents, or pastor say that you are ready to spiritually set the tone in a relationship? May I call them and ask? Ephesians 5:22-25

10. What are your physical boundaries and what is your plan to ensure that we would not cross them? Ephesians 5:22-27

     This makes me immediately think of the story of the master who hands out money (talents) to his servants found in Matthew 25:14-30.  Three servants are given money and two of them invest the money and double it.  While the third servant takes his money and buries it.  The servants reasoning to his master for burying his money is that his master was a man who profits, and seems to indicate doesn't like losing money.  For some reason I picture the boardroom for The Apprentice in this interaction.

     The master in plain language is that he is not happy.  How worthless this servant was to do nothing with money given him.  What the servant saw was that his master did not enjoy failing, but what he missed was that master only succeeded by investing.  You can't make money by hiding it.  The church cannot be built by hiding the materials, which is the GOSPEL of Jesus Christ.

      The question for us is are we collectors or users of what God has given us?  Can we say as Paul that we are being poured out as a drink offering or do we say that we haven't ruined our collectable?  Now let me be clear, we cannot not build the church or the kingdom!  ONLY GOD can do that.  YET, it is clear that we have called by God as the body of Christ to go and invest the Gospel that we have been entrusted with so that disciples may be called out to go and do likewise.  We will share at times when we see no profit, but at least we used what God so graciously gave us, because we realize grace was not created for us, but all those who might receive it.

     May I........May we, the church, be users of the Gospel today and not a worthless collector.      Amen

Now, flashforward 3 months and that same finger is still swollen, red, and a little tender to the touch. So I finally go and consult a doctor about my situation and he expalins that some how a piece of the sticker had not been removed and that it was causing my finger to try to heal an area that could not be healed until that piece was removed. He then had to go and numb my finger and burn basically a hole in my finger. This would remove the piece of the thorn or sticker, and allow the body to begin to heal.

This got me thinking of what insignificant sin is in my life that I think nothing of, and months later find has caused major issues in my life? Even more it has caused me to ask, what sin would any true Christian consider insignificant? At what point do I stop believing that the enemy comes to steal, kill, and destroy my testimony and life? If this is true I should know that satan will use anything to bring about that destruction?
BUT…. I am so thankful that it is just as true that is I serve a God that will use anything to show me the truth. No matter how big or small; even a sticker, to remind me of the great truth of being called to live a Holy life. Thanks for the reminder Father!

Ephesians 5:1–3
1 Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children; 2 and walk in love, just as Christ also loved you and gave Himself up for us, an offering and a sacrifice to God as a fragrant aroma. 3 But immorality or any impurity or greed must not even be named among you, as is proper among saints;

1.  Prepare the hearts of the students that are coming to hear the calling of the Holy Spirit

2. Pray that I would hear the Holy Spirit's leadership in what to say as I preach.

3. Safe Travel

4. The band Cirlceslide as they lead worship.

5. Our 2yr old daughter would do well being away from home for so long.  The better she does the better mom and dad will do.  So that health does good, rest, etc.  Also praise the

6. Pray against my pride and that I only rely on Christ not any other means to see lives changed.

Thanks again for praying and I hope I will be able to update you on the week as we are there.  Love you guys.

Short an Quick

    My Upmost For His Highest by Oswald Chambers:  I will always list this as a great devo for teens and adults.  I still go through this about every other year and just absolutely love it.  It is quick easy reading with a great challenge everyday for a full year.  Can't go wrong with this one. 

   While Shepherds Watch Their Flocks by Timothy Laniak:  This is a awesome 2-page reading everyday for 40 days.   If you are someone who really wants to challenge yourself with a ministry mindset this is the book.  Quick and fun read everyday that will challenge you in all phases of try be a minister in your life whether on staff or a lay leader.

Little More Time.

    Stop Dating the Church by Joshua Harris:  In a world that I believe has less and less comittment or true love for the church (local church) I think this book is a must read.  I also love it because it straight to the point.  he doesn't take 200 pages what could be said in 80.  Thank you Josh for those of us that don't love reading.  It also comes with a study guide which I love.

    Love or Die by Alexander Strauch:  I am about halfway through this book but I love it.  It is a very close look at and challenge from Revelation chapter 2 when Christ speaks to the church at Ephesus.  Now the reading in this book is really short but most chapters he gives quite a few passages to look at and I feel that if you will take the time to look them up and truly meditate on the message from this passge it will have a great impact on you.

Again I hope these help you as they have me.  by no means are these the only good devotionals out there but these have greatly impacted my life and so I would love to pass them along to you.

Well, I will do my very best to keep this post short but just thought I would share how God used this trip to impact me.
1. As always when I go just about anywhere I realize just how spoiled I am. To be able to go church in the building we have. To be in a community that so many believers live in. To overlook how blessed I am with incredible musical talent in truth and polished preaching in truth; when others just want truth not talent or polish.

2. The world really does need the Gospel to be preached. Living in the Bible belt of America I forget how much the world really does need the Gospel. Oh and ya that includes my neighborhood not other countries only.

3. I was humbled to be reminded that I am a terrible leader when I am not fully relying on God. I caused so much frustration in my lack of hearing God for our team by just relying on my hard work and knowledge. It was a crumbling moment to realize that I was hindering the work of the gospel because of my pride and self reliance.

4. Ok this one will be a little longer. I learned what it really means to PUSH! In order to make this make sense I need to tell you a story and I will do my best to shorten this but still make it understandable. The pastor of a church in the town of Somotillo began to pray and believed that God had given him a vision to buy a mountain right on the edge of town. (It was more of a really tall hill not like a Rocky Mountains mountain) he decided to approach the lady who owned the land and share the vision with her. She actually let him in her home and listened to this vision. She then stated that she would need $16,000.00 for the land. Now understand that the average income in Nicaragua is around $1000.00 a year. Obviously, the church did not have the money, but the pastor said we will begin praying and if God gives us the money then we will come back to you and buy the land. So here is where the story gets great. The government came to same woman and wanted to buy the land for $70,000! The woman let the pastor know and he told her that is great for you and your family go ahead because we don't have the money and this will help you and family so much. A day or two later the woman contacted the pastor again and said I need you to come over now. The pastor did and the woman said I believe that God is commanding me to let you buy this land whenever you get the money for the original price of $16,000. Again the pastor told the woman that the governments offer was very generous and that she should take it. She had a contract drawn up that stated she would only sell the land to the church whenever they got the money and told the pastor that I need to do this before I decide to disobey God and sin. One year later the church bought the land. And now they are even in the process of building a radio tower on this mountain that will broadcast the gospel to almost a million people in three countries. So not only did God provide the land but now the radio tower that was a part of this vision.

So PUSH! The pastor would wear a hat everyday that said PUSH which meant Pray Until Something Happens! That was it. They have land and a radio tower because they totally relied on God through prayer. If I would only be a man that trusted God enough to pray until something happens instead of always trying to use my experience or knowledge to do everything. I want to PUSH and give God all the glory for the things that He does not give praise to our church or me but to the powerful work of God. When that pastor shared that story there was only one thing I could think which was God is great! When is the last time that something happened in my life that when I shared with people they said man only God can do that? I don't believe very often but I am asking God to lead me to pray for those things and that he would show his power to this world

  Now before I begin this blog I must first give all the love to Jason Gilbo. A former pastor here in Oklahoma that provoked this idea. So this is not my own thought but very much a rip off of his idea and concept. Though it is worth sharing with you so here it goes.

It is very interesting to think about the difference in thermometers and thermostats. Though the two very much do some the same thing at the foundation of what they are. At its most basic function both tell us what the current temperature is. When we have that night time sniffling, sneezing, coughing, aching, stuffy head, fever, so we can't sleep feeling; one of the first thing most of us will do is reach for a thermometer to see if we truly do have a fever and need medicine.

  The same is true when you get up in the morning and you feel that chill come over you and you think to yourself, "man it really feels cold in here." Your next move will most like be to add clothing and then go check your thermostat to see if your sense is correct.

Though these basic functions are very much the same the end result is very different. The thermometer can only tell you that you do for sure have a fever and therefore are sick. That’s it. In a few days or hours it might be able to let you know that your fever has passed meaning that you are getting better or at least your medication is working. The thermostat on the other hand tells you that yes your sense of it being cold is correct and now you need to turn up the heat so that the atmosphere can change. You see the thermostat can go one step further and actually change the situation. Now sometimes the thermostat can be set in such a way that it over compensates making the atmosphere too cold or hot, but when used correctly can make an impact of change.
So the question simply becomes which one are you? Are you a thermometer that is always letting everyone know that they are well or sick; or are you a thermostat that actually helps to bring about change to an uncomfortable situation?

  I recently surveyed about 10 HS students to ask them how well they felt our ministry did at welcoming new people. Sadly they gave us 2.5 out of 10. Not so good...... Ok really bad. BUT then I asked them to score themselves on how well they feel they do at welcoming new people and they gave themselves a score of 3 out of 10. They were more than willing to be very harsh with their words towards our ministry and how awful it was and how snobby our people were, yet they were doing nothing to improve it. They had become unhelpful thermometers rather than trying to be thermostats.

 As you go about your day which one will you be? Don't just talk about darkness but shine into it! Matthew 5:14-16

    I am so blessed to be apart of a youth ministry that hungers and thirsts for the truths found in scripture.  They ask so many profound questions that only come from true study of God's word and desire to know what it teaches.  So my job must be so easy working with a group that is so hungry for the truth of scripture.  Well, I would say it is much easier than many I know, but there is a danger and weakness that comes with this trait as well.  The danger is that they begin to define their Christian life by what they learned, memorized, or begun tounderstand, rather than; what they are pouring out.

    When we look at the life of Jesus we see that He emptied himself, that He came to serve not be served, that He laid down His life on His own accord and no one took it from Him, and that He came for the sick not the healthy.  In all of these you see that Christ's mind was on emptying Himself of what God had filled Him with.  Though it seems for us that we very easily get caught in what I can I gain from this to make me more mature or deeper in my faith. 

    Our first instinct is not usually, how can I share this truth I learned today with someone around me. Very rarely in any aspect of life do we have an attitude of I gained this so i could give it to someone else.  If we get a raise few of us this man I just got few $100 a month that I could use to bless someone elses life.  Instead it is I might be able to pay for my kids college better or retire faster.  When we get a bigger house few of us think, we have more space to help people who have no home or lose their home in tragedy, we think man it is so nice now that we have more space for us and the kids now.  Man I have this great tutor or mentor that is making me awesome, instead of I have the tutor or mentor that has shown me how to teach these things to someone else.

    So how can you today take what God has poured into you and pour it into somone that God puts in your life.  hasn't God poured life into us so that we can be ambassadors of that life to those around us?  Seek to be filled not to be full but to be filled so that you can be empty.

   So to the guy with the pornography issue I recommended X3watch to him and suggested that he have the emails from X3watch be sent  to his mom. His response was that is crazy no way.                                                                                                                                                                                                          To the girl I suggested she not even consider dating anyone. Even if they were a "good guy" until she felt like she was rooted in putting God before guys. Again I was being a little nuts.
   To the guy who was struggling to find time I asked him to fast from Xbox for one month and fill that time he was spending everynight with bible study and prayer. A whole month he asked. What about like a week?

   I was reminded then of a quote I once read by Oswald Chambers that said, "Have I made this decision about sin - that it must be killed right out in me? It takes a long time to come to a moral decision about sin, but it is the great moment in my life when I do decide that just as Jesus Christ died for the sin of the world, so sin must die out in me, not be curbed or suppressed or counteracted, but crucified. No one can bring anyone else to this decision."

   Now, I am not saying that we will ever live a life on this earth that is completely void of sin.  Though I do believe that scripture says that sin is not to be my master (Romans 6).  I also believe that many of us do not live in such a way that we are truly trying to rid ourselves of sin, but that rather we are attemptign to curb it, suppress, it or counteract it. I know that is the truth in my life.  I will say there are sins that I want out of my life, but really I just want it to not be as bad. 

   By the way I also do not believe that I can overcome sin.  I believe that only by the power of the Holy Spirit that dwells in me, and the crucified sacrifice of Jesus Christ I can overcome sin.  So may I today trust in Him and the power of His resurrection to see sin begin to die in my life from now and until the day that I see Him face to face.   Hebrews 12:1-3

I found myself looking at John 1 and want to challenge myslef and other men in my life to give something far more valuable than money or toys.  So here are three things that I am hoping to pray over myself and live out this Christmas and God willing beyond.

Give your full presence! John 1:1-5, 14
Think about the fact that God is everywhere and yet he still chose to come and be physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually present with us. The sad fact is that we as guys are known for being with our family, but not really being there.  We are contantly seen as men wishing we were somewhere else or our minds are only thinking about getting home to watch the game.  Can you imagine if this had been teh character of Christ?  Don't get me wrong Heaven was always on His mind but He was here and totally engaged in ministry on the earth while he was here.

Give your service!
One idea constantly taught by Jesus was that He came to serve not be served (Matthew 20:28; Mark 10:45; John 13:5-20). Yet, at the celebration of Christ’s birth we tend to be known for sitting, eating, and watching football or going hunting. None of those are bad things but they shouldn’t define us.  When is the last time you saw the men volunteering to help with food, cleaning, prep of house, or whatever at Christmas?  No we always have the attitude that our wives or mom's made us do it.  What if we sacrificed some time and served?

Give your grace!
What better time of year do you have to share the grace of Christ with others? Easter is great but it is a day. Christmas is a month of opportunity to talk about Christ and what He has done for you. Isn’t grace the reason that Christ was born? Men you are called to be spiritual leaders! Use this time of being surrounded by the idea of Christ to begin living that idea out and share the gospel with all you can.

1. Do not be on a computer in an area where you are alone.  You should always be on computer in a public place or in a family room where others are.  By the way, being on a computer in the family room when no one is home is still being on a computer when you are alone.  In the age of laptops this is becoming more and more difficult.  So make boundaries that are necessary to not allow yourself to be on your laptop alone.
   
             Oh and by the way, be cautious of data plans and cell phones!!!  There are too many phones that can access full web
             images and video.  Because of this you need to treat phones as much as possible like a computer.
2. There are some great software products out there and I have found one to be very effective.  The reason I recommend this over other software products is because there is an accountability feature.  Most software has some kind of blocking system but no accountability.  This software will allow you to pick accountability partners that will receive email reports on sites that you have visited.  You can take a look at this software at http://x3watch.com/
3. PRAY!  Parents pray that your kids would get caught.  Then pray for wisdom in how to minister and shepherd your child through that time and temptation.  Students pray that you would learn to love God and that his plan for your sexuality would trump your lustful desires.  I know that sounds so simple but it really is the bottom line for how we overcome any temptation.  Oh and Mom and Dad you can pray that for them and yourselves also.
4. Parents, pornography is not just a male issue.  I recently saw a survey where 13% of the women surveyed admitted to looking at pornography at work.  So not only is it not just a male issue but it is also not just a teen issue.  This is a sin issue that has no age or gender boundaries.  Don’t make this a teen male issue only!
5. Lastly, I would remind all of us to be careful of what we define as pornography.  For instance, Sports illustrated swimsuit editions are not considered pornography.  Really?  Ya Really!  But I would argue that it has the same intention as “pornography”!  This is what I believe is the most difficult part of this battle.  There are so many commercials, billboards, TV shows, movies, and magazines that are not rated XXX yet the result of seeing or watching is much the same.  For your life and those around you, try to lead a life that desires there to not even be a hint of sexual immorality among you, according to Ephesians 5:3!

   I have tried to separate these recommendations into 3 categories to help you pick one that might best suit your life.

1.   The One Who likes to Read: 

By the way, I am not this person.  But if you are a person who likes to read then here are some ideas.  There is a devo book called My Utmost For His Highest by Oswald Chambers. It is a quick verse or two  and about a page everyday for a year. So it is not a long read, but the style of writing can be difficult to understand so I would only give this to someone who reads at a high level and enjoys it.  I would also recommend the book Humility by CJ Mahaney.  I don’t know that this book is designed to be a devotional book, but is great as one.  5-10 pages of reading if you did it by chapters every day.  It’s a geat read!

2.   The One Who is Not a Reader:

This is more of my world.  There are several versions of a devotional called 31 Verses Every Teenager Should Know by Student Life.  When I say versions I mean that there is one that is 31 verses about the Bible, or 31 verses about our identity in Christ and so on.  These are great quick reads and I have found them awesome for memorizing scripture. Here is the link if you would like to look at or purchase these books. Click Here

3.   The One Who Journals:

I have two recommendations for those of you who love to journal.  The first is A Life Worth Following  (more for guys probably but can be good for girls too). This devotional was put together by a youth pastor from right here in Oklahoma.  One of the students of their church passed away in a car accident and as he read his student’s journal he thought this would be great to pass on so he did.  You can find this book at this link: click here.  I would also recommend The Search for Significance: Student Edition by  Robert McGee. 

I hope these recommendations help if you are looking for some form of a devotional book.  Love you guys and talk to you again soon.

My last post I had told you that my mother had been diagnosed with a recurrence of cancer from head to toe.  My mom passed away July 21.  The same day my wife's grandmother passed away.  We had laready been living out of a suitcase trying to go back and forth from home to see my mom in the hospital.  The week my mom went into the hospital was the week before I was suppose dto lead a group of 350 to our HS camp in Florida.  One of my best decisions in life was to not lead that trip.  I stayed back and stayed at the hospital with my mom and family.  It was the first tiem I had ever had to miss a camp and it was a very strange thing but again the best decision ever. 

As i told you in a former post my Mom was a believer in Jesus Christ.  So I it is beautiful picture and overwhelming comfort to know that my mom is hearing the Angels shout to one another "Holy Holy Holy is the Lord of Hosts, the whole earth is full of His glory."  Jesus thank you for the grace that you freely gave to cover the soul of my mother.  As great as my mother was to me this was not a gift that she earned or deserved, but only recieved through your love for her and again your choosing to give that grace.  God thank you for that.

As for me; God has used this time to stir in me to be a man who seeks wisdom in his life more than just in the crisis of life.  In the midst fo the spurring fromt he Lord I have started reading Proverbs this week and instantly I see my life described.  In the first Chapter it talks about wisdom shouting out as to get the naive's attention but they ignore the cry of wisdom.  Then when calamity comes they look for wisdom but cannot find it because they ignored it and chose not to fear the Lord. 

How desperately I need wisdom to teach my Naive life.  So much of my life has been lived as a fool who ignores the cries of wisdom until calamity comes to life and then in my selfish desire to succeed or have a easier path I then cryout to wisdom.  My prayer is that I would be slow to speak and quick to listen!  That I could live as proverbs says, "But he who listens to me shall live securely And will be at ease from the dread of evil."(Proverbs 1:33) 

Father I lack wisdom in my life, but I am asking that you would teach me how to live in all situations.  would I not be a naive fool who lives as though he hates knowledge (Proverbs 1:22).  Teach me to fear the Lord and to love wisdom and instruction (Proverbs 1:7).

   Of course I tried to be strong for mom; whatever that really means!  the best part was my mom looking at me and sayng that no matter what she was ready.  i replied that i knew she was.  She then replied but you know what I mean I am ready for what is come whenever that may be.  What comforting statement that my mother knows she going to see her savior whenever that day arrives.  So we talked about what few options were left and then after playing some more the most beautiful baby girl in the world they went home.

   As a youth pastor I have prayed with many families and people for healing for them or a loved one.  I have even seen God answer those prayers.  I truly got to go pray with a women in the hospital once and the next was told that her cancer was gone.  But this not a stranger its my mother and I find that i pray for healing but i am not sure how much faith I have that healing will come.  Maybe it is a defense move so that i dont get disappointed.  But i don't understand why my prayer seems and feels so faithless.  I just find myself saying God heal her but knowing that part of my heart is already trying to prepare for the life to come rather than now.  Sometimes i even want my mom to be in Heaven where i can know that she will have no pain, or not start losing her memory, or deal with the illness that comes from treatment.

God would you help my unbelief.  Would I pray that your will be done!  Would I not be double minded in my prayer!  Also help to see what else i should pray for besides jsut my mothers physical healing.  Would i pray for family to find salvation for family members.  For your glory to be revealed.

  As I view my life I see so many more failures than this.  I can onlyh hope that Christ would allow me to be used in half the ways that Peter was.  What a comfort to be reminded I don't have to be perfect but I do have to just keep gettign up and placing Christ first and he will remain faithful even when I am faithless. (2 Timothy 2:13)  Thank you Father that you never let go of us.  That you always see Your Son in us.  May I drop all and follow you today and continue to do the same even after I have failed misreably. 

So last weekend I am at a leaders meeting with some of our students.  We have a time called the Hot Seat as created by Chris Newkirk.  This is a time where we select one student at a time to sit in the middle of  circle and anyone can encourage that student in anyway that they want.  Well after having all of our senior leaders go through the hot seat then anarchy occurred.  The seniors attacked me and said that I had to go through the hot seat. 

One student said something that really stuck with me and made me think about how I do ministry. She said, "I know that you love us so much and you always give me hope.  Whenever I think I can't so something or God can't use me you make me and all of us believe that we can.  You have no idea how much that has meant to me."  WOW! 

But the question then came to my mind is that true for all the students feel that way?  Do I give them hope?  I wrote a while back about how I believe that our words impact what people think of themselves, their thoughts about their relationship with Christ, and ultimately the way that they live.  All I can do about that is control my words and actions.  So do i communicate to the students that pastor and the students that I preach to at other event a message of hope.  That they leave believing it is possible; highly possible to live like Christ.  Peter talked about this in I Peter 3:14-15.  He said don't be afraid of those who try to intimidate you; sanctify Christ as Lord and be ready to give a defense of the hope that you have.  Make Christ first and tell people about your hope!  It seems like sometimes instead we give people apologetics, our rules, our morals, our church, instead of Christ our Lord and the Hope that comes with Him.

SO this week nd hopefully the rest of my life I want to share the Hope I have in Christ and also pass that hope onto every leader and student that is apart of any ministry I do.  Thanks breakfast club for the love and making me better.

One story was of a hired hand who caught in the wilderness in the midst of a great storm.  The storm was fierce that the sheep scattered as did the hired hand.  The shepherds on the other hand spent the entire night gathering the sheep back together while the hired hand ran in fear that the shepherds would take his life for leaving the sheep.  Which Laniak says they could have done but he doesn't say if they did.

The stories in this book have reminded me that to be a pastor was never to be easy.  There will be days that are very stormy.  So stormy that the congregation may scatter but as a shepherd I am called to stand with the sheep.  Then I thought where are these pastors.  It seems like so many of my conversations with pastors is about how frustrating their churches are or how as a youth pastor they can't get along with their pastors or that they don't like the worship at their church.  Then there is another group that you talk to you that same the same things and then talk about starting their own church so they can have a church the way they want church to be. 

Now I understand that there are some situations that truly are bad situations, and churches that do not want to be a church that do not want to be about the Kingdom of God.  Yet, isn't it a Shepherds job to lead the sheep where they should be and not where they want to be?  Who is going to lead the sheep that back that have scattered or find the sheep that are lost if all we do as pastors is find places that we deem as found and healthy.

Jesus said it like this, "John 10:11-21 (NASB95)
11 “I am the good shepherd; the good shepherd lays down His life for the sheep. 12 “He who is a hired hand, and not a shepherd, who is not the owner of the sheep, sees the wolf coming, and leaves the sheep and flees, and the wolf snatches them and scatters them. 13 “He flees because he is a hired hand and is not concerned about the sheep. 14 “I am the good shepherd, and I know My own and My own know Me, 15 even as the Father knows Me and I know the Father; and I lay down My life for the sheep. 16 “I have other sheep, which are not of this fold; I must bring them also, and they will hear My voice; and they will become one flock with one shepherd. 17 “For this reason the Father loves Me, because I lay down My life so that I may take it again. 18 “No one has taken it away from Me, but I lay it down on My own initiative. I have authority to lay it down, and I have authority to take it up again. This commandment I received from My Father.” 19 A division occurred again among the Jews because of these words. 20 Many of them were saying, “He has a demon and is insane. Why do you listen to Him?” 21 Others were saying, “These are not the sayings of one demon-possessed. A demon cannot open the eyes of the blind, can he?”

As dumb as this sounds but I want to be like the pastor described in the book This Present Darkness.   Forgive my paraphrase but he is a pastor that the church keeps voting to try and fire him because his preaching is stepping on too many toes yet he remains with no plans of leaving.  He actually prays that God would keep him there and bring revival to the small town that God has called him to.  Then there are angels who say of him,  "He is why we are here.  He called out for the Father to send us.  Even now as he mows his yard he prays for the church and town"

I want to be that kind of pastor.  Always crying out to God to move and never giving up on people that seem so far off.  I want to be a picture and embodiment of The Good Shepherd!  As the reverend from the movie the Patriot said, "A shepherd must tend his flock, and sometimes fight off the wolves." 

Where have thses shpeherds gone?  Am I shepherds or am I a hired hand?  Am I one who will run when the wolf comes?  I pray that I am not!  God teach me and drive me to be a shepherd that stands with his flock in good and bad.  That is willing to go where the you send me Lord.  Whether that means small or large flock.  Healthy or in need of revival flock. Give me a love for my sheep that cannot be quenched, and Lord forgive for the times that I don't shepherd this way.

   I had never experienced that before because i am always stressing out over getting them to whereever we are going and then home. Today i understand better.  There is that emotion where you are so excited for them and you can't wait for them to see God move and for them to get to share the story of Jesus with someone.  You can't wait for them to get stretched and pushed to lead more than they ever have before.  You can't for them to realize they are capable of so much more than they ever thought they could do.  Yet, i don't want them to go.  At least don't want them to go without me.  You want to be there when they succeed and be their biggest cheerleader and be there when they fail so you can encourage them to keep going.  i don't want to go through the next phase, which is; when they get home i will have no clue about any of those things and will have to try to pull it out of them.  Though it will be frustrating i know it will be worth the struggle.

   All that to say I didn't realize how much i love my kids until today.  For whatever reason seeing them go and me not there made me realize how much i love spending time with them.  How much i love seeing them do what God made them to do; Take the Gospel to the world.  I am so blessed to be called the youth pastor of this group, and i do not want to waste a moment of pouring all i have from my Savior into them.  Thank you God for the opportunity to be called into ministry and to receive the responsibility of shepherding teenagers!  What a blessing that i do not deserve.

It was at that moment that I realized this baby girl (Logan Hannah) could be here literally at any moment.  Everything changed at that  moment.  Every call from my wife scares the crap out of me.  All those toys and bouncers have to get put together now.  Have we saved enough money thoughts are racign through your head.  It has so effected to way that I live in the past two days.  Every moment that I have to just be with my wife and go on dates all the sudden seem more important than ever.  Saving money more important.  Reading parenting books more important.  Prayer more important.  Getting nursery totally setup more important.  Every moment is now more valuable!

I remember a preacher one time asking the question what if we lived in such way that Jesus could come back any moment.  How would it change the way we live our lives?  After this week I have gone back to that question and I would have to say a lot.  What if as followers of Jesus we realized that our time to be undershepherds and ministers was quickly coming to an end?  I definitely see that is something that is lacking in my life.  An urgency and value of every moment that I have to glorify the name of Christ.  I need to live with that passion! 

So today I want to make a choice to love God and love people as though any moment my opportunity to share that love with the world as you know it now could be my last.  Father give me the strength to follow you with wreckless abandon!

  We had over 700 teenagers from 7 different churches gather together to be challenged by scripture and come together as the body of Christ.  We spent time praying for every campus in our community.  We even had a time where HS students prayed over MS studetns that was awesome and we had a time where MS students prayed over Hs students.  In the midst of having that many students gathered together and staying the weekend in other people's houses there were no majuor glitches.  Even more important was the fact that studetns met with Christ.  They were challenged to "Follow Jesus" and they have to this point accepted the challenge.  So again it was a weekend where God showed that he cares more for the sutdents in our ministry than I do.  He showed that he knows more about the details than I do.  It is that same old thing that I always here every pastor say after a big event, God always comes through and puts everything together.  So thanks Lord for showing that You are in control and that You provide and that you still answer prayer!

   I don't why but right before every event that I help coordinate it feels like the sky is falling.  It seems as if nothing is going right and that everything is going to fall apart at any second.  I start to wake-up with nightmares of did I give the band and speakers the right dates or did we get food ordered or are we sure that person knows they are a sponsor.  I start to get worried about all the financial implications if not enough people come.  I worry about anything and everything you can imagine.  Then Friday the start of Big Weekend gets here, and all of the sudden I am calm and filled with excitement.  Why?  Because at that moment I recognize the fact that there is nothing else I can do for the event.  There no more ideas I can come up with to make this event over the top incredible but now it is all about the Holy Spirit coming in power and changing the lives of teenagers.  All I can do now is rely on Him!

   I feel like God is really trying to lead me to a place where I truly pray more.  To a place where my life is much more like the first day of Big Weekend or camp than the week before.  A place where I stop and realize that is God that changes lives and not programs or events or ideas.  Now I am not saying that planning or trying to think through details is a bad thing.  Those things are needed in order to make the program or event go smooth, safe, and have as little distraction as possible so people can focus on Christ.  What I am saying is maybe that I could learn to trust and rest in Him with the details rather than on me.  Maybe I could somehow stop and pray and be reminded that God knows every detail that needs to be met.  He knows every word that needs to be said.  He knows every worry that is stressing me to the point that feel like I can't breathe.  I can almost see Jesus in my mind with smile and just shaking His head saying, "Daryl, you ready to let Me help you?" 

   So for anyone who might actual read this very unknown blog please pray that I would stop and rest in Him with details.  Even more so pray that this weekend would change students lives.  That they would come with hearts of fertile soil where the seeds of truth can take deep root.  Thanks!