This week is going to be an incredible week for the Kingdom of God.  Our church has 5 teams going on mission trips all over the world; literally.  Two of those groups are made up of many of our High School students.  21 of them are in Nicaragua as of yesterday, and just 20 minutes ago another group of 50 left for Phoenix, AZ.  This is the first time in 10 years that i am not going with my kids on any of our trips.  You see my wife and are expecting our first child in about 2 1/2 weeks.  I am not missing thtat for anything but......As the bus was pulling away one of my interns texted me and said, "The kids said you look sad."  I replied, "I am.  My kids are leaving without me."  I had no idea that it would feel this way.  I thought I would miss them and all that, but I didn't know I would miss them this much.  Now, I have so much of a better understanding of what parents go through when their kids leave with us on trips. 

   I had never experienced that before because i am always stressing out over getting them to whereever we are going and then home. Today i understand better.  There is that emotion where you are so excited for them and you can't wait for them to see God move and for them to get to share the story of Jesus with someone.  You can't wait for them to get stretched and pushed to lead more than they ever have before.  You can't for them to realize they are capable of so much more than they ever thought they could do.  Yet, i don't want them to go.  At least don't want them to go without me.  You want to be there when they succeed and be their biggest cheerleader and be there when they fail so you can encourage them to keep going.  i don't want to go through the next phase, which is; when they get home i will have no clue about any of those things and will have to try to pull it out of them.  Though it will be frustrating i know it will be worth the struggle.

   All that to say I didn't realize how much i love my kids until today.  For whatever reason seeing them go and me not there made me realize how much i love spending time with them.  How much i love seeing them do what God made them to do; Take the Gospel to the world.  I am so blessed to be called the youth pastor of this group, and i do not want to waste a moment of pouring all i have from my Savior into them.  Thank you God for the opportunity to be called into ministry and to receive the responsibility of shepherding teenagers!  What a blessing that i do not deserve.